SO ANYWAY

turns out my freshman friend wasn't lieing

the guy doesn't like me, he likes the girl that's been all over him for how long

BUT last week he said they were just friends, now how does that work? and he said the same thing in november.

my gay guy friend talked to him and that's what he said
so i've been kinda bummed out

I mean, i've liked this guy for over a year, and he didn't even have the balls to talk to me

AND the really confusing thing is is that he acts like he likes me

So I have pretty low self esteem again, because no guys like me... well I dunno, they don't talk to me atleast...

The only guy that I knew liked me was like....a nerd, but he's had like a lot of girlfriends

and I found out the kind of person he is, and I definately do not approve.

so this guy was the last guy on my list
he's pretty much the ONLY guy in this town WHO:
believes in God
plays guitar
likes the same music I do
Is really nice and has manners
but is funny
and has cool hair

So yep, i'm SOL now

but yet i'm kinda pissed off at myself for being a chicken

OH BUT GET THIS

he thinks of me as a friend

and I told my friend "how can he think of me as a friend? he doesn't even talk to me?"

so yeah, I don't know what's gonna happen now

all I know is that he should have told me to my face in the wayy beginning if he didn't like me, even though I think he did, and still does somewhat

but nothing I can really do now except be "friendly"

and this girl is a douche bag by the way

and she's kind of a bitch

well, I guess that's his choice, but i have a feeling that if it doesn't work out with this girl, guess who's gonna be after me (maybe)?

so yep

I have a sad love life >.>